Child care  

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We all know those now days the children obesity is a challenging topic in the competitive world. More of the metros cities in India have changed; they have started to follow the western culture. In Delhi along more than 20% of the school children aged 10 to 16 are overweight. Obesity is on the rise among the children in various states. Rapid urbanization, unhealthy food chooses and a decrease in physical activity is the causes. Television viewing and eating fried foods are directly linked to obesity in children. All these factors are the main reason for the obesity in children. Here are a few steps to follow. Children should eat only healthy foods. Mothers should avoid the masala items in their cooking. At least once in a week they can use it. Children should avoid eating fried foods, such as fried rice and also the main reason for the obesity is the junk food. They should do a lot of physical exercise. Nowadays they don’t go out and play. They should run, jump and play it is this time that the children can play. So children should try to follow these tips for a healthy life.

A Lesson In Morals  

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One day at the end of class, little Johnny's teacher asks the class to go home and think of a story to be concluded with the moral of that story. The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their story.

Little Suzy raises her hand. "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road."

When the teacher asked for the moral of the story, Suzy replied, "Don't keep all your eggs in one basket."

Little Lucy went next. "My dad owns a farm too. Every weekend we take the chicken eggs and put them in the incubator. Last weekend only eight of the 12 eggs hatched.";

Again, the teacher asked for the moral of the story.

Lucy replied, "Don't count your chickens before they hatch."

Next up was little Johnny. "My uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam war, and his plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed but could only take a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete. On the way down, he drank the case of beer. Then he landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but then he ran out of bullets! So he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more. Then the blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands."

The teacher looked a little shocked. After clearing her throat, she asked what possible moral there could be to this story.

"Well," Johnny replied, "Don't fuck with Uncle Ted when he's been drinking."

How many sheep I do have?  

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There once was a blonde who was very tired of blonde jokes and insults directed at her intelligence.

So, she cut and dyed her hair, got a make-over, got in her car, and began driving around in the country.

Suddenly, she came to a herd of sheep in the road. She stopped her car and went over to the shepherd who was tending to them.

"If I can guess the exact number of sheep here, will you let me have one?" she asked.

The shepherd, thinking this was a pretty safe bet, agreed.

"You have 171 sheep," said the blonde in triumph.

Surprised, the shepherd told her to pick out a sheep of her choice.

She looked around for a while and finally found one that she really liked.

She picked it up and was petting it when the shepherd walked over to her and asked, "if I can guess your real hair color, will you give me my sheep back?"

The blonde thought it was only fair to let him try. "You're a blonde! Now give me back my dog."

Talking cow  

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A man's car stalled on a country road one morning. When the man got out to fix it, a cow came along and stopped beside him. "Your trouble is probably in the carburetor," said the cow.

Startled, the man jumped back and ran down the road until he met a farmer. The amazed man told the farmer his story.

"Was it a large red cow with a brown spot over the right eye?" asked the farmer. "Yes, yes," the man replied.

"Oh! I wouldn't listen to Bessie," said the farmer. "She doesn't know a thing about cars."


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Grocery Store Tantrums  

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A man in the grocery store notices a woman with a three-year-old girl in her cart. As they pass the cookie section, the little girl screams for cookies. The mother says, "Now Missy, we only have a few more aisles to go -- don't throw a fit. It won't be long."

In the candy aisle, the little girl whines for candy. The mother says, "There, there, Missy, don't cry. Two more aisles, and we'll be checking out."

When they get to the checkout stand, the little girl howls for the gum. The mother says, reassuringly, "Missy, we'll be done in five minutes, and then you can go home and have a bottle and a nice snooze."

In the parking lot, the man stops the woman to compliment her. "I couldn't help noticing how patient you were with little Missy," he says.

The mother sighs, "Oh, no -- my little girl's name is Francine. I'm Missy."

Espanol para Matadors  

Posted by Admin

Q: What do you call four bull fighters in quicksand?

A: Quatro sinko.